What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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