yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize