that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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