i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
