is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
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