4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Randomize