HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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