3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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