Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
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