Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Randomize
