this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
she peed on how many people?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize
