My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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