im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize