Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
