he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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