Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
