my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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