Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
