I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
