Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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