why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
