Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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