I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize
