are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize