I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
