oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Dick very happy bro
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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