I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
