I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
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