Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
