I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
