I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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