so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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