can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
