oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
