I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
