this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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