Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize