redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
How's work?
Spinning.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
