my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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