All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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