I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
