The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
