Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize
