Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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