I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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