Rock
Scissors
Fuck
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
