I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
