we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
