It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
