do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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