if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
