One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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